Category Archives: October 2012

October 16, 2012: Perfection

I think part of my struggle for October words this season has been the weather. It’s been warm. And dry. And not October-y at all.

And then today, when I was leaving work, there was a moment of near-prefect October.

The light was perfect. The sky was grey, both dark and light. It was just about to rain but the drops hadn’t yet begun to fall. The wind whipped through the trees that line the parking lot. The pavement was still wet and dark from a shower that had just passed. The leaves from the trees, mostly a deep brick red, were everywhere.

And that, my friends, was when October hit me. Full-force.

Now my mind is whirling with all the stuff I need to write about by the end of the month. So much October to fit into what’s left of, well, October.

Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be rapid-fire starting tomorrow. Suggestions welcome.

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Posted by on October 16, 2012 in October 2012


October 15, 2012: The Portal

There’s a place in Northeast Portland, an overpass that crosses I-84, that I have long believed might be something more than just an overpass.

I’m fairly certain that it is, in fact, a portal into hell.

There’s something about this time of year, halfway through October specifically, when the darkness of winter is just beginning its advance. Something happens and I start seeing things I’m sure are not really there. I’m pretty sure I saw a werewolf on Broadway downtown today. Just a couple blocks from where Trader Vic’s used to be and in broad daylight, he looked lost, confused. I’ll stipulate to the fact that I may be crazy and he may have actually just been a homeless guy but, this far into October, let’s just assume he was a werewolf.

So, anyway, this overpass in Northeast Portland. On more than one occasion over the years, I’ve seen…creatures there that could not possibly have been human. Rather, they were the kinds of creatures who looked to be turning, but hadn’t quite settled into their human forms. Or they’d settled into their human forms, but hadn’t quite gotten the nuances down. Something akin to this:

I guess, in a way, we all have those moments, when we just don’t feel comfortable in our own skin. If you’re having one of those moments, do me a favor: stay off that overpass. Y’all just freak me out.

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Posted by on October 15, 2012 in October 2012


October 14: More words

In case it hasn’t been obvious, I’ve been kind of stumbling through these. My mind has been elsewhere. My days are filled with numbers; mind-numbing to a person so based in words. My soccer team is in shambles. My Facebook and Twitter feeds are full of politics.

Part of the problem I’m having with October lies in the fact that I just don’t think I can ever surpass last year’s full-immersion October. Pumpkin patches and corn mazes and a day in wine country for fall crush, there’s simply no way I can ever duplicate it.

I ate an apple today. That’s about as Octoberific as I’ve been able to muster. Thankfully, we’re not quite at the halfway point so there’s plenty of time to catch up.

I’ll do better. We’ll get this thing done.

Today, October friends, I give you candy corn.

First created in the 1880s, candy corn has become a staple of the October diet. You may not like it but, if someone offers it to you, you eat it. You can’t help yourselves. There’s no shame in it. Years ago, I found a quote online that referred to candy corn as the crack cocaine of the confectionary world. I just went looking for the source of said quote and, stupidly, found a link to last year’s blog post about fancy corn. Stupid internet.

It’s Sunday. You’re all lazing around. Make your own.

And here’s a horrible idea that I know you all are just DYING to try: fancy corn martinis.

ZOMG Cancy corn vodka. Please note: this post was made in March. March, people.

One more. Now, you can bathe in the scent of candy corn. I’m not sure why.

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Posted by on October 14, 2012 in October 2012


October 12, 2012: So, about that pina colada…

Okay, so I’ve been to Trader Vic’s a number of times since they reopened here in Portland. Never once have I had a pina colada there. You want to know why? Because their thing is mai tais. MAI TAIS. A whole menu of mai tais. The sad, lonely pina colada isn’t on any of the three drink menus.

This is incredibly disturbing, especially in a town like Portland, a town inhabited by any number of blutbads and other creatures who might be in the market for a cocktail at a downtown tiki bar.

I wonder what Warren Zevon would say.

I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand
Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain
He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook’s
Gonna get a big dish of beef chow mein

Werewolves of London!
Aaoooooo! (Repeat)

If you hear him howling around your kitchen door
Better not let him in
Little old lady got mutilated late last night
Werewolves of London again

Werewolves of London!
Aaoooooo! (Repeat)

He’s the hairy-handed gent who ran amuck in Kent
Lately he’s been overheard in Mayfair
Better stay away from him
He’ll rip your lungs out, Jim
I’d like to meet his tailor

Werewolves of London!
Aaoooooo! (Repeat)

Well, I saw Lon Chaney walking with the Queen
Doing the Werewolves of London
I saw Lon Chaney, Jr. walking with the Queen
Doing the Werewolves of London
I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic’s
And his hair was perfect

Werewolves of London!
Aaoooooo! (Repeat)
Draw blood…

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Posted by on October 12, 2012 in October 2012


October 11, 2012: The return of the grey

The fog has returned. Two days in a row here, holding strong through a significant part of yesterday.

I’m well aware that fog has been known to appear at any time of year, but it seems to take on a special significance in October.

Because October is creepy. If October were a place, it would be a safe harbor for all things sinister and monstrous. It holds mystery and terror and is a breeding ground for all those things that make the hair at the back of your neck stand on end.

And all those things are perfectly happy to be shrouded in a thick grey cloak of fog.

I’m looking forward to heading out this morning into the fog. Perhaps I’ll meet a nice werewolf and we’ll go get a pina colada at Trader Vic’s.

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Posted by on October 11, 2012 in October 2012


October 10, 2012: Words

For years, I’ve counted October 10th as my anniversary as a writer. It’s silly and sentimental but, if you’re reading this, you know these two things are cornerstones of my personality.

I have a hard time writing in the summer. There always seems to be so much going on. Admittedly, I did more writing than I expected to this summer, but it ended up being in a field I never expected to be writing about.

But here we are in October and I’m slowly shifting over to my usual October creepiness.


In the distance, the last chime of the church’s bell slowly falls to silence.

Silence. Silence and darkness.

What lurks there?

Your pace quickens with your pulse. Your eyes dilate, but never enough that you see what might be just beyond the circle of light cast by the streetlight.

And believe me, there is something there. There’s always something there.

You pause there, in that circle of light. Do you dare set foot beyond it?

Happy October, kids.

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Posted by on October 10, 2012 in October 2012


October 9, 2012: Oh what tangled webs we weave

Another short post today as I’m still recovering from my Seattle adventure. Apologies.

Everywhere I look, spiders.

This is how I know October has arrived. They are everywhere.

Spiders have become a symbol of October and, more specifically, Halloween. Spiders themselves tend to give me the creeps, but their webs are fascinating. I hope someday to be half as good a knitter as spiders are weavers.

Well, that was an awkward sentence. Hrmph.

So, go look for some spiders. Don’t squish them. They eat the other crawlies.

Happy October.

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Posted by on October 8, 2012 in October 2012